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What’s the Likelihood of Finding Your "Soul Mate"?

I get a lot of mail from people that wonder if they’ll ever meet their "soul mate". That’s a reasonable question by itself, and it started me wondering.

First, what is a "soul mate"? It’s a person that is your exact, perfect mate in all ways.

There is a misunderstanding of this idea however. Most people assume that there’s only one soul mate for each person. In fact, there are thousands of perfect soul mates - maybe even hundreds of thousands or millions! Doesn’t that knowledge ease the burden of finding your own soul mate?

Unless you’ve spent the last 10 years living in a bus terminal bathroom, you’ve probably heard of the "Human Genome Project" where human DNA is being mapped. There’s a lot of potential benefit coming out of this project, and also some very interesting findings.

For instance, according to researchers in this project, did you know that there’s only about 1,000 different human "types"? That is, every 1,000th person you meet is perfectly identical to you genetically! That’s a very important discovery for many reasons.

A second important discovery was made recently where it appears that women seem to prefer men that smell like their fathers - even if the father isn’t/wasn’t present in her life. I won’t go into all the [boring] science here, but the researchers determined that what these women actually found most appealing were men that had identical immune systems to their fathers.

What does this mean to you, and how does it relate to finding a soul mate?

Simple - all things considered equal, if you only have 1 type of person that is your perfect match biologically (and in fact, it’s much more likely to be many times than that number), you should be able to find a soul mate in at the very least 1 in 1,000 people you see.

Bear with me while we do some quick math:

Right now, there are about 6.3 billion people walking the earth. That means that if only 1 in 1,000 are your soul mate, you have 6,300,000 soul mates out there! Now, let’s say that only ½ of those are good choices for any particular reason. That leaves 3,150,000 people that are your perfect soul mates.

Oh, wait! ½ of those (or so) are the same sex as you. You’re probably looking for the opposite sex, right? That only leaves 1,575,000 people.

Get that: 1,575,000 people are your (biological) soul mates! And, that’s only if 1 in 1,000 are your proper match! What if 5 in 1,000 are, or 15 in 1,000 or 50 in 1,000 or even 200 in 1,000? That means as many as 31,500,000 of your soul mates are walking around out there that you haven’t even met yet!

You’d better get started finding them!

This begets the next question, "What makes someone perfect for you?"

Obviously, without knowing you it’s hard to say, but I’ve developed a tool as part of my new book, "Being a Man in a Woman’s World II" that I call the "Rating Instrument". This is available in the book, but I’ve also created software to do the same thing! You can download it for free from my website at: Just look for the Rating Instrument on the home page, click it and you’ll find the download links.

Most guys live by the "looks scale". For example, "She’s a ‘9’ [on a scale of 10]." Unfortunately, this is a terrible way to find your perfect woman! Just because she looks good enough to you doesn’t make her worth your time. Believe me, I’ve dated many ‘10’s’, only to find out that they were "5’s" or "6’s" at best once you got to know them. Could you imagine being married to someone like this? What a sure way to a life of hell!

"Then, her looks begin to fade"

No, the Rating Instrument gives you a much better way of rating women - on 10 different areas of your life. Instead of talking about "8’s", "9’s" and "10’s", it lets you talk about RI85’s, (Rating Instrument - 85 points), RI90’s, etc. The best part is that it gives you a real picture of exactly how she meets your goals; whatever they are - not just on how she looks!

Get your copy today - it’s free to download!

Best regards...

Have a love, relationship, sex or man/woman question? I answer all email. You can write to me at for answers. For more information about my books, "Being a Man in a Woman's World" (volume I & II), and other products visit: Check out the discussion group at:

Copyright (c) 2004, Dr. Dennis W. Neder All rights reserved.

posted on Friday, May 14, 2004 11:11 AM

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